Courtney Farrar, Oral History, Visual AIDS Day With(Out) Art 2023, December 1, 2023

All right, this is Daniel Kerr. Could you tell us your name?

My name is Courtney Farrar.

And we are at the David Bethuel Jamieson Studio House on Walbridge, and it's December 1st, 2023. And could you tell us what brings you here tonight?

Well, my best friend has an exhibit here tonight and is on the panel, I should probably put that down [laughs]. And I was the person who found the interest in the stones that are of question tonight.

And could you tell us about those stones?

So we started actually, I wanted to get kind of more healthy, so we started taking walks after work. When Tee would come home, I didn't have a job at the time. I had just moved to D.C. And I went, "hey, how about when you get off, you know, you're kind of riled up when you get off. How about we start just taking some walks around?" It's nice around here. There's trees and stuff. These are really pretty houses. I want to see more because I like architecture. So I wanted to see the houses and how they were different and what modifications were made to them. So that's how we originally came to them. I wanted to take a walk.

Could you describe the stones for us?

So, I— my family is from more of a rural part of Virginia, so we always had this, I guess, reverence for the dead. It was always you honor them, you make sure that their name is known. Why did they put these stones down here? You only put stones out if somebody— you really, really love that person, or there's a reason. There's always a reason for headstones, for markings, for even street signs. Street signs always mean something. So it was just a, I just get like that. So you can tell all the time, I just, I get an idea and I stick with it. Right now I'm on coins, like quarters and dimes and stuff, but I get an inkling that I can feel it. Yeah, no, this might be something, you know? So that's how we ended up at the stones.

And tell us what your thoughts were when you saw them.

So initially I went, who put a headstone out here for their dog? Because you could tell that it wasn't a big enough plot for a person to be buried there. I've been to a lot of funerals from a little bitty child and I know, yeah, that's not big enough for a person to be there. This must be for a pet, or a hamster or something. You know, I'm thinking crazy things. So that's what I originally thought, and it was just, we searched stuff. We like to know why what is what. Because the why's of the what are a lot more important than the what most of the time. So just finding the why was what I was trying to do after that walk.

And tell me what's the impact that it had once you started learning about this story?

So, I think the impact was already there. My family has already— like I said, they've always been big on what is the history? Why is this happening? How can we fix it? And even if— we didn't know if there was a problem, but if there was a problem, somebody put it here. We don't know who it is. By the way, I'm looking for you, too. I want you to tell us. Why did you put it there? But just the whys, like I said, the whys are way more important than the whats, so that's it. That's literally it

It seems to me that brings the whole kind of story, the AIDS epidemic, at a very kind of close—

Right, yeah, and we saw that it was '90s once we figured out that— well once Tee figured out, because I kind of, I was like, yeah, nah, this is your story—but once Tee figured out that they were all in the '90s, and they may have all have been in the LGBTQ community, they definitely honed in on that, and that's what we went with.

That's nice, yeah. Wow, and could you tell me more about, let's see, about how this may have changed the way you think about the epidemic, the AIDS epidemic?

So, I don't think it changed a lot for me. It did get me a little more excited about it because I've always been a person of the underdog, of how can I help? You know what I'm saying? So from that perspective, I don't think it changed my opinion of it, but it definitely, with the energy that Tee had, like Tee was hyped for this. Like, I've never seen Tee hyped for something so much in my life. And it was amazing to see that transition. Yeah, but I don't think it changed anything for me.

Nice. Now, if you could honor somebody through creation of a headstone, is there somebody you would like to honor?

Yeah, I would. So, it would be a two-in-one. I would honor Tawana Farrar and Angela Farrar. They both died of some type of disease that could have maybe been prevented, or maybe been studied more. Angela was the daughter of Tawana, and she had sickle cell disease. My aunt Tawana died during the COVID pandemic. She had had multiple strokes, multiple heart attacks, but she was always our rock. She told you where to go, she told you what to do, and she lived what she said. She went out and she grinded, she did everything that she needed to do. So yeah, it would be them for me. It would be them, both of them together. And she was a baby when she went, so that's who I would take.

Is there anything you'd like to leave us with?

Just— Be the person that you would want somebody to be to you. That's all I got.

Thank you so much.